Statistics show that the youth of America are growing fatter and fatter by the day. The number of obese children is staggering and is due largely to the slaughter of potatoes for a "snack" called "potato chips."

     Our valiant potato reporters (hidden in sacs of potatoes) have placed a hidden camera in an obese child's home for the image to the right of this article. In the image you can see this young man clutching the bag of "chips" as if they meant life or death for him, but in all actuality it means death for many unfortunate potatoes. The slaughtering, cooking, and eventual eating of potatoes is a growing terror and is somthing we need to put a stop to immediately.

    We have a quote from Mr. Eglar himself about this article, stating ways to revolt against this terror.

    "If you are against the slaughtering of potatoes for "snacks" and want to stop obesity, please do something about it. You can contact your local Potato's Rights Activist group, or picket outside of a factory, anything and everything you do for the cause is greatly appreciated."